What is wrong with me lately??

So I just totally flipped out on my poor grandpa. He was talking to me AGAIN about covering up the hole in the wall that we can't actually repair until the termite people come and determine what they are going to do.. so I'm fed up hearing about it (partly my fault because I've been putting off covering the hole.. just my laziness) and I started getting huffy. Well he keeps on talking and I flat out flipped. Not quite yelling, but a little on the verge of shouting telling him we'll get it done RIGHT NOW and have it done and over with. His problem is he wants to explain everything again and again and again.. and I can only take so much repetition until I want to scream. SO poor hubby walks in and starts to say that the plastic we're going to cover the hole with isn't going to make it darker, and I half shouted at him to stop and just go get the plastic. I didn't want hubby changing grandpa's mind because then we'd be having a whole new discussion and I was completely fed up. Then once we covered the hole and I calmed down grandpa starts talking about looking for rest homes so that he's "not burdening us or causing fights." Total guilt trip and it totally worked. I broke down and cried and apologized and told him that I didn't mean to be hateful or hurtful that I was just frustrated and I know he's miserable sitting in that chair day in and day out but that he's slowly getting better and there's no need for a nursing home because he'll be in therapy for his shoulder soon and he can stay home.. especially after all this time. If he was going to go into a nursing home I wish he would have done it from the beginning.. but I didn't tell him that. So now I'm trying to make up for being such a mean bitch and trying to be patient and calm.
I knew when we moved in here that there would be tension.. I never knew it would be this bad. I try so hard NOT to flip out (I'm not a patient person by any means) because I know he doesn't like the situation he's in, and that he does try to think about us when he can. He's helping us out so much by letting us live here.. and I know we're helping him too by being here.. but I just can't be patient ALL the time, no matter how hard I try. I thought I was doing so well... And even mom agrees that grandpa can be a handful..

I hope that this isn't a sign from God that I shouldn't have kids or something. I mean, how do impatient, quick to get angry people do it?? Yes, kids are a little different than my grandpa, but still.

So severe mood swings today.. and even yesterday a little. But yesterday it was a swing from bored/tired to super hyper and bouncy. Sounds bi-polar I know! I just wish I knew what the heck is going on with me lately! Grr..